Jan 6, 2008

Thoughts on Surgery


Well I guess this says it all!
Actually this is as close as I could get to
what I will be looking like in two weeks.
In reality I have been on crutches for 4 months now,
since Aug 30, 2007 to be exact. It looks like I will
continue to be on crutches for at least another
10-12 weeks. UGH! Although the first 6-8 weeks I
will not be allowed to even put my toe down, which
should definitely make life interesting to say the least!
Let alone the pain I have been told to expect. Good
thing there are pain medicines in our world today!

So what have I learned so far about
my journey through knee pain...

1. Don't take your knees for granted.
2. Your knees are your mobility...the biggest part!

3. Sitting down and standing up is controlled by your knees!

4. Being over weight your whole life truly does affect

more than just yourself....it affects your family too!

Oh I am sure there are a lot more points I have learned

in the last 4 months and am about to learn in the next 4.
I am busy preparing my family and my house for
a huge change. God is definitely teaching me humility,
dependence on Him and others, and that I have no control
over anything. I can not control my environment and I can
not control the out come. What I can do is trust in the
Creator of the Universe and know that as long as I
live for Him and trust He knows what is best that I am
going to be fine. Peace comes from the Father above!

Yes I will be honest I am scared! Not really of the surgery,
but yes I'll admit it, what if I don't wake up...what if something
bad is found...what if the surgery doesn't help...what if....
I am nervous about the weeks following the surgery,
the pain, the rehab & the pain that comes with it.
I am nervous about how Sean will maintain our
household, work and still Pastor our church efficiently.
I am nervous about the kids and them not understanding
why Mommy can't get in bed "with them" or let them
sit on my lap, or that I can't give them their baths.

Well instead of concentrating on the "what ifs" I am going
to trust my judgement that I have been lead to and
I have chosen the best Doctor for this surgery and for me.
I am going to concentrate on getting better as soon as I can,
so I can start my new healthy life.
This has already changed my life!

I am going to concentrate this year on getting to a healthier weight
for my knees but mainly for my life. I want to be around when my
grandchildren are growing up. I truly do want to live my life
to its fullest and I have not done so in the last 37 years.
God is a God of mercy, grace, strength, and HE is my all in all!
Through Him I can and will accomplish my life goals,
be at a healthy weight and look fabulous!

I declare:
"This shall surely not be me in a year!"

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