Remember

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Do you remember where you were when the first tower was hit? I do, sitting with my grandmother, watching NBC's Today Show and talking to my sister-n-law on the phone...flipping out! As the events unfolded that morning, I realized that how I viewed the world and our safety here in America was fading. I grew up and at the time was living in Venice, Florida. Home to one of the flight schools that at least two, which included the main leader, of the terrorists that attacked NY that day had attended and learned to fly. In fact these two men actually rented a room from a family down the street from my brother and sister-n-law. We later learned that they had also rented a house from some friends of mine, Steve Kona. What a small world we live in. I will never forget what I was feeling and where I was on Sept 11, 2001. We had family in and around the World Trade Center Towers that morning when the towers were hit. Thankfully and by the grace of God all of them were able to escape and are physically fine. Emotionally they are still very much effected. My prayer today is that those that lost family members, friends and coworkers that morning will find peace in a loving Heavenly Father.



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Thoughts pondered

OK I am still having so much difficulty focusing on things of now! I mean I can't stop thinking about the Unstoppable Conference! I can't stop thinking about all my wonderful God orchestrated friendships that have been built on, created and rekindled! Gosh I miss those ladies so much! I would love to be sitting around the table again talking about "Ruckus", assistants that are naive, dogs with strange names (will not post it here!), just so much fun and laughter. It's amazing how God orchestrates things. How He moves and brings people together! I truly believe that I have some new lasting relationships with these ladies!

As I posted in a previous post I forgot my camera so I am borrowing some great photos from my dear friends. I am sure they won't mind.

This picture is of two great women! Pastor Deanna, Jessica S. and I. Deanna's daughter took this picture. This was like a few minutes after we met, if I remember right. Girls do I have that right?



This is a picture of the two wonderful ladies that I shared a room with while there. Sheryl and Carrie. Both awesome women of God! I had so much fun with them and Jessica on Friday night after the table laughter. We laughed ourselves silly till almost 3 am. SO much fun! I think all of us agree that we had a fantastic time.



While there I happened to purchase a book by Sandy Phinazee, "Quiet Places Where the Father Speaks." AWESOME! It's a 31 day women's devotional. All I can say is WOW! I started reading it on Monday and each day I have been ministered to through what Sandy has written. It really has been like a refreshing waterfall of the Word. I have had to reread it every day because it is just SO GOOD! Deanna you are SO RIGHT about this book! If you didn't get it ladies I highly suggest you contact Sandy and ask her how you can get your hands on it!

Tomorrow is our day off. Sean does not work at his secular job and we take this day off from church business unless an emergency takes place. Today I spent time just sitting at the alter praising God, praying and seeking Him for guidance about some things. I just can't get enough of His presence, even a small morsel is not enough. I was so dry and thirst before this conference. Despite all the scripture reading I was doing I was dry and thirsty. Now I am full but still thirsty. I can't get enough of Him! Have you ever been at a place where you feel like you are so full and yet you just have to have more and more. That is where I am right now! It's just not enough to spend a few minutes or even an hour in prayer, praise or scripture. God has definitely reached deep within me and brought life back into my spiritual walk and relationship with Him!

How Unstoppable has Changed me

Ok I have written a little bit here and there about my adventures over the last few days while at the conference but I have not written fully about how it has impacted my life. I have been trying to digest everything and I still am. You know that God is at work when you need to take days to digest everything you have heard, learned, and have been impacted by. I feel as if I am still eating every time I look at my notes, read a blog that either Deanna or Tara has written about the events.

So on Thursday when I arrived at the hotel the women who greeted me were fantastic! One of them and unfortunately I can't for the life of me remember her name actually helped me to my room. It isn't easy trying to carry a big bag, a suitcase and then this wonderful goodie bag (which I will share about in a minute) and try to walk using a cane. She was so sweet, I felt like an honored guest with her helping me. We get to my room and it was beautiful! I wish I had brought my camera...so any pictures I post on here will be from either Tara's or Deanna's blog. Anyway, we all were given this wonderful little bag of goodies. Inside there was yummy chocolate, a book "Musings of a Maraschino Cherry: Reflections on the Role of a Minister's Wife" by Peggy Musgrove, and other little things such as a candle and book mark. But the best gift was a framed note, it said "Melissa, Don't Worry! I have it under control! Love God" When I pulled that out of the bag I immediately had tears in my eyes! It was exactly what I needed to read! How many times do you get a personal note like that, that hits home in a way you don't expect?! I mean I read the Bible and I am always ministered to but that framed note was just EXACTLY what I needed to read. I now have it on my dresser so it's the first thing I see in the morning before I get ready for the day! It reminds me that God does have things under control and I can trust Him for the day! (Thank you PD or whoever came up with that idea!)


So Thursday night I walk into the the main room where we were going to have the conference and dinner. I was looking around talking to a few people when out of the corner of my eye I spot the one person I HAD to go see. Pastor Deanna was surrounded by women. I honestly didn't want to interrupt her, specially when I noticed that Tara was standing there as well. I knew how close they were just from my readings.
But here she was and when she saw me she actually squealed! Which surprised me honestly and she gave me this hug...a hug that welcomed me, like we had known each other forever! Honestly I have never had a hug like that from anyone I was meeting for the first time! PD - just thinking about it makes tears well up. Honestly, I have admired Deanna for her strength and courage despite all that she personally has been going through! She is one tough cookie even if her center may be soft (smile). That hug was so filled with love it was overwhelming to be honest. She immediately had me sit with her for dinner. What an honor! Here I am, a little ole nobody sitting at the table with three powerful speakers - Tara Sloan, Sandy Phanazee and Deanna. What an honor. Women I have admired from afar. Women I want to be like when I grow up! I have heard Sandy speak at other events and have always been ministered to. I have been ministered to through Tara and Deanna's blog for almost a year now. I felt like I was sitting with royalty, honestly I did. It was great!


We had a wonderful meal before Pastor Deanna spoke on "A Series of Unfortunate Events". I have to say when she began sharing I thought to myself, "she is reading my mail or maybe my blog!" This year has been "A Series of Unfortunate Events" for me. Every time I think I am getting ahead something else smacks me down. It was based on Ezekiel. What God spoke to me is that it really has nothing to do what is happening to me or around me, what is important is what is happening in me, how are the wrecks changing me...for the better? or for the worse? God allows things to happen for a reason, and even if I don't get it as long as I am trusting Him through it that is what is important. Sometimes you just have to do it "Anyway" like the song by Tina McBride.

There was great ministry that night. Then even better fellowship after service. I went back to my room with Carrie and we stayed up talking. It was late and the phone rings. Scared me and Carrie or at least it did me. I sorta jumped, I definitely wasn't expecting it to ring. On the end of the line was Deanna. Which really shocked me to be honest ... she was letting us know we had another roomie coming up...Sheryl. What a blessing to have them both with me to share the events with!

I have to say rooming with these two women was great! I originally was going to be staying with Michele. With everything she was going through last week, it was so much better for her and I that Deanna worked it out for me to stay at the hotel...THANK YOU PD! You know, God always has a plan and I know had I not been at the hotel I would not have connected with Carrie, Jessica, Sheryl, Jessica S., Tara or Deanna.

I have to say Jenn Lee took worship to a higher level every time she and the group lead us. It was fantastic to be able to worship without worrying about where or what my kids were doing. A luxury I do not get. I was able to let go and worship and it was fantastic!

Friday was packed with some fantastic workshops. Then that night Tara spoke about "the Breaking Point" and like I said in a previous post she hit the nail on the head! God reached in deep and touched me in a great way. I felt a release to just be real. I even gave a testimony that night.

So here is what I shared and this is how I feel even today. Pastoring Partners a ministry started by Deanna Shrodes has been a life line to me. When Sean and I moved here we had never been in a Senior Pastorate. We had been on staff at Venice Assembly Of God under Pastor Gary and Rhonda Gray. Two wonderful people and we learned so much. We will always cherish that time and our friendship with them. But when we came here I felt alone. I felt like NO one else had or was going through what I was going through. Then Michele through me this life line and I felt like I finally had a place to go to find support, understanding and love without feeling condemned. The women on there get it. They too struggle and are real people dealing with real issues. Then I learned about Unstoppable. Everything came against me going. Even up to the week before I was to leave. And yet I was determined that nothing was going to stop me from going, I became "unstoppable". I am so glad that I went.

The vision that Deanna has for this ministry is even larger than what she may have dreamed. I am sure of it! This conference is so different from anything I have ever gone to. This conference and this ministry is so needed for Pastor's wives and Women in ministry. We women have a tendency to isolate ourselves and this ministry gives us a chance to be real again. I have always been a person who is real. I don't sugar coat anything. But I haven't felt free to share what I have been going through, not even on here. This weekend gave me back my love, excitement and desire for ministry. It gave me what has been missing for a quite sometime. I have been going through the motions of ministry. It happens more than people realize! But I returned home with the desire to do what God has called me to do. I know Sean is thankful for what took place in my life.

What is funny and I honestly can't remember if it was Deanna, Tara, Jenn Lee or Sandy that said it but one of them stated, be aware that you will hit a wall when you get home, that satan will use your husband or your kids to steal what God has done in you. I am so glad that was said because I went home aware and on guard for it. And you know what...that is exactly what happened. But I was prepared for it so I saw it for what it was and laughed to myself about the situation.

Friday night sitting and eating dinner, sharing and laughing together was so what I needed. Like I said I have never laughed so hard about some of the funniest ministry stories I have heard! Laughter is great medicine! But even so is good fellowship with people that get it, that understand the struggles we women go through in the ministry, just the time to eat together, laugh and cry together...is huge! It really was a highlight of the conference! I mean other than the messages. I had so much fun! Spending time with Carrie and Jessica afterwards was even better! We went back to Jessica's room and laughed so hard my sides hurt. We got this crazy call, the front desk saying they had complaints and that we needed to quiet down. Then a knock at the door. From our side of the door it was hilarious, here was Jessica peeking through the peek hole that was covered up and Carrie standing behind her with the iron in her hand ready to smash it against who ever was on the other side of the door. I couldn't help but laugh, it was so funny to watch! Then when they do open the door there stood Sheryl and Jessica (the other one) and they were laughing at us...they played a terrible trick on us. Jessica S and I have decided that next year we are going pay them back, some how...

I have no idea what Deanna may be thinking about for next year but what ever it might be...I am going to be there! Whatever it takes I am going to be there! I am sure I will share more but for now I hope you have gotten a sense of what took place and how it ministered to me!

The Good the bad and the Smelly Airplane trip!

Like I promised, here is my airplane adventures. Carrie and I had to bolt out of the last message by Tara and Deanna on Covenant Relationships (PD I want a copy of the tape!) We both had to catch our flights home. Susan took us to the airport. A great gal I might add! Definitely a sweetie! Anyway on the way Carrie looked at her itinerary and about flipped I think, she thought her flight was at 3:52 and it was actually 2:52. We got there and she made it but honestly it was by the skin of her teeth I think. Carrie ~ I too was stopped by security...forgot to take my phone out of my pocket...talk about nerve racking, even when you are innocent.
So once I got to my terminal I had about 30 mins to just sit and think about the previous days events. SO much to take in and honestly I haven't had a minute to even stop and think. Not fully anyways. Let me be frank...I HATE FLYING! I don't mind the take off I hate the landing. I also absolutely hate turbulence. Thankfully on my flight from Tampa to Charlotte NC we had no turbulence.

So here we are flying through some awesome clouds. I do love looking down on the clouds, that I do enjoy about flying. When all of a sudden a flight attendant asks if anyone has any medical training. There is a passenger that is having heart pain. Thankfully there was a doctor on board. I believe God places us where He needs us. I truly believe in divine meetings! I was not far from where the older lady was sitting and I began to pray. I prayed every healing scripture I could think of. I prayed for this woman's soul, for her healing, for her family members that were starting to panic. Then the doctor started to panic and was telling the flight attendant that we needed to make an emergency landing. I began to pray harder for this woman. She was going in and out of consciousness and was losing color. Her husband was crying as was her daughter. I prayed harder, was praying in the spirit and just kept claiming healing over this woman. Then I said out loud, "In Jesus Name be healed!"

I am not kidding the woman sat straight up in her seat! Her color came back and she was talking again. FINE! I mean completely fine! The doctor just sat there amazed. He kept shaking his head in disbelief. The flight attendants were shaking their heads and the woman's family was really crying now, happy tears I must say. PRAISE GOD!

When the plane landed, it took me 20 mins to get off the plane. It was that full and I was sitting that far in the back! I had only 15 mins to get to my connecting flight and was told the concord I needed was about a mile away. Isn't that just nice! There was and emergency crew waiting for the woman when we got off. As I was rushing past I stopped and told her that I had prayed for her and that I would continue to. Her husband looked at me and said "Thank you, you saved her life." I said, "NO! God did!"

I literally had to run/walk faster than I have in over a year! No kidding here! My poor knees were screaming at me! My calves if they had voices would have been really screaming at me! I got to my connecting flight and immediately boarded the plane. Now before I tell you about that part of the adventure let me stop and say this... GOD ALWAYS HAS A PURPOSE AND A PLAN for your life if you are just obedient to His calling! I have no idea if anyone else on that flight was praying for that woman but what I saw happen is and was truly a miracle. That doctor was sure that she was dying from a heart attack! I honestly thought she was dying too. But when you call upon the name of the Lord He is sure to answer! I truly believe I witnessed a miracle! I truly believe it was my faith in God and the power of prayer that He came into that plane and touched that lady! I will never be the same! I know God answers prayers, He has for me over and over but what I saw Sat. afternoon was truly a miracle!


Now as for the rest of my journey....it was SMELLY!
I am not kidding. My seat was row 7 seat D. It was an express plane so it only had two seats on either side of the aisle and had approximately 50 seats total on board. As I was walking back to my seat I saw this man and I kept saying to myself, "Oh please Lord, please not next to him!" Don't get me wrong here, he wasn't scary looking. I just didn't want to sit next to a man on my flight home. Well guess what...that is exactly where I had to sit! That man was the SMELLIEST men I have smelt since street witnessing to the homeless in Miami! I am not kidding, he smelt like rotten eggs! I immediately wanted to vomit! NO KIDDING! If I could have changed seats I would have! The two women sitting in front of me were gagging. What made things worse...I started smelling something even worse...I looked at the man and he says, "Sorry." He passed gas! I just about lost it! I leaned over into the aisle just to get fresh air. The guy across the aisle said whats wrong..then he got a whiff...he just looked at me and I said, "It's him, not me!" He just laughed! Not only did I sit next to the smelliest man we had terrible turbulence coming into Nashville. All I could do was pray we would land and that I could get off that plane ASAP! I really tried to think of a way to talk to the guy but I just couldn't get past the smell. Sorry folks...I may be a co-pastor, I may be a Christian, but I just couldn't get past the stench.

UNSTOPPABLE ROCKED!

I can't say it enough...
UNSTOPPABLE ROCKED!!!!

So much has happened since I last wrote. Thursday I spent the whole day with my parents. Was able to spend more time with my youngest niece and nephew and before heading to the conference was able to stop and see my other brother and his kids. Boy do kids grow fast in one year! I also had a nice visit with a close friend of mine, Christy Cain. She and her husband were my youth pastors when I was a senior in high school. Since then our friendship has grown. It was so great getting to just sit and talk even if it was a short period of time. Christy has been such a blessing in my life.

So Thursday night we had a wonderful dinner...yummy! I was blessed to finally meet Deanna Shrodes and Tara Sloan. Two of my favorite bloggers! These women are phenomenal writers, co-pastors, and wonderful women of God. They spoke into my life this weekend like never before. I am always ministered to when I read their blogs. I have followed Deanna's blog since she was in Africa last year. I love her! ( I mean that PD!) She is honest, not fake. She puts it out there and even when she may be struggling she doesn't sugar coat what she is going through. I like that, appreciate that and feel blessed to call her a friend. ( I MEAN THAT PD)
Tara is also a wonderful women of God. I met her through Pastoring Partners. She has been an encourager and prayer supporter when I have needed it. She spoke Friday night and let me just say for me, "she hit the nail on the head!" Her message was exactly what I needed to hear! It ministered to me deeply! The worship, the message, the people who prayed with and for me that night....has changed my life. I am forever grateful PT for your boldness and sensitivity to listen to the Holy Spirit and speak truth into my life as well as all those other women in ministry!
There is so much I want to share and I will in the next few days. I am like I said still trying to digest everything I have learned, heard, experienced. I laughed so hard at some of the most funny stories on Friday night. I laughed so hard my sides were aching and my cheeks were throbbing. Laughter is good medicine! We stayed up late (3:00 am on Friday night) and got up early for some great words of wisdom on Sat. I will forever cherish this time. I was able to meet women I have been corresponding with through blogs and Pastoring Partners, which was an added plus I must say! Finally meeting Jessica and Carrie was exciting! Those two women are hilarious and are now some cherished friends I can't wait to spend more time with in the future!



But I have to say getting to spend time with a dear friend, Michele, was definitely a highlight to the conference. Michele has been going through some tough times with her son. Specially last week and yet she took time to come and spend time with me. Michele, you hang tough girl! I know God isn't through with you or Marcus! DON'T give up at the threshold of your break through! I love you girl and am praying for healing for Marcus and for you! Next time I know we will get to spend more time together. I honestly cherish getting to spend the time with you. I also enjoyed getting to know Cathy and Misty. Two more wonderful women that PD has talked about alot on her blog. Two women that support and love her.




So much to share, just so much! I will or I will try to post my adventures of the airplane ride home later tonight or maybe tomorrow. Let's just say the first leg of the trip was a divine appointment and the 2nd well it was not a divine appointment...more like a VERY SMELLY one! Will explain that later. For now I plan to spend time going over all of my notes, catch up on emails, and most importantly spend time with my kids and my hubby. Who by the way survived the 4 diaperheads, cleaned our house and although I am sure he could now use an Unstoppable conference or something like it, did a fantastic job while momma was away! Thank you again Seany for supporting me in everything I do! I love you babe!

Florida...home sweet home!

So my airplane adventure was just that! The pilots must have been crazy because we arrived in NC for my connecting flight 30 mins early and then my flight into Tampa was 25 mins early! Now how amazing is that! I mean its not often that you get to your destinations early! To my delight, my brother Chris and sister-n-law surprised me with my Dad in the back seat of the car! He looks so good and is doing fantastic! Remember just 5 weeks ago he fell and shattered the top of his tibia. He really is looking good and doing well. The doctor says he is surprised at how well his leg is healing! I know it's the power of prayer that God is healing him from the inside out!
SO I am here in sunny Florida. YAY! I love my family and have missed then so much. I got to spend time with two of my nieces - Kaelyn & Kamiya and two of my nephews ~ Brock & Aiden. Kamiya was only 4 mo old the last time I saw her. She is such a sweet little thing. It makes me wish we didn't live so far from home. But IL is where God has placed our family and I believe that is where He wants us. I can't believe how much my nieces and nephews are growing. Geez in one year Brock is almost as tall as his mom. Watch out Leah in another year you will be the shorty of the family! LOL!
So, ok DID ANYONE SEE THE SPEECH BY SARA PALIN??? SHE ROCKED IT!!! I mean honestly, I love how she speaks. No holds bar, no political jargon. She is definitely a fresh face to Washington. The more I hear and read about her the more I like her! As for the media...good grief! Since when are they innocent? I mean we have all fallen short and sinned...hello that is why Jesus died on the cross and rose again! To save us from our sins! LEAVE THE KIDS ALONE I say! For heaven sake, if the media wants to attack the character of the candidates fine, but do it with dignity and leave the family out of it. I give Obama/Biden credit there, they too believe the kids need to be left alone! And as for this thing, Palin preaches abstinence and here is her daughter pregnant....hello people...have you ever heard of free will? I mean despite every parents wishes we can not control our kids forever and you can not make them do anything, they have a free will to chose and act on their own decisions. Does that mean Sara Palin should be attacked this way just because of her daughter? I don't think so!
No one is perfect who walks on this earth! NO ONE! I am sure the media will continue to drudge up things against McCain and Palin. I have yet to see them do the same against Obama and Biden. I think I know why...Obama seems to be the "messiah" to the media. Hello there is only one Messiah and He reigns on High! His Name is above all Names! He is King of all Kings! Jesus Christ is the only messiah who has every walked on this earth! If the media wants to hang the Republican party candidates they need to be fair and do the same with the Democrats!
Enough said! Sara Palin ROCKED IT TONIGHT! My favorite quote from the speech tonight ~

"Here's a little news flash for all those reporters and commentators: I'm not going to Washington to seek their good opinion. I'm going to Washington to serve the people of this country," she said. You go girl!

Watching her tonight, I just kept thinking ~ how many doors has this women opened up for my daughter! For my future grand daughters!

Now the reason I am in Florida....watching the hurricanes.....is for the UNSTOPPABLE Conference! How fitting is the name of that! After everything that has been against me getting here...I am here and I am ready for an outpouring from God! I know that Pastor Deanna and Pastor Tara have put their hearts and souls into this conference despite everything they themselves are involved with and have been dealing with personally. I am looking forward to the next few days! But I have to be honest...tonight when I called home to say good night to the kids...Sara broke my heart...."Mommy I like you (her way of saying I love you) I want you to come back, I want you to hold me, I will be good...Mommy I love you too" All with tears and sobbing. It broke my heart completely! I do miss them already and I miss my honey, Sean.
Sean if by chance you are reading this...I LOVE YOU! Thank you for braving the next few days alone with four kiddos! Thank you for supporting me and loving me unconditionally. I love you babe!

Hotel rooms....

I am sitting in a hotel room in Nashville listening to my 4 kids discuss the "Wipe Out" show on ABC. They are talking about how they would jump across the big balls and if they would make it across. What is really funny about it is that on Sat. this past week they piled up pillows and blankets (everyone we own) to make a Wipe Out pit. Kristofer was the commentator. He would refer to the guys on the show. Which surprises me because I don't even know their names and he does. He remembers everything he sees and hears.
So why am I sitting in a hotel with 4 kiddos, well you see I am going to the Unstoppable Conference in Tampa Florida. Which will be so fun! Just to get to worship without worrying about where or what my kids are doing during that time will be nice. So to cut some time we came down tonight. I will be catching a plane in the morning well actually at 1 pm but with the way airport security is now days I have to be there 2 hours early. Oh so much fun!
But I have to tell you despite the craziness of last week and some changes to this week I know God has something awesome for me and the other pastor's wives and women in ministry! I am looking forward to meeting some of my blogging friends and spending time fun time with family that live in south of Tampa in Venice FL.
I will not have access to a lap top or computer while at the conference so I will post when I get home. Until then...

Michele hang in there! God is in control. I know right now it may not seem like it but He is very aware of what is going on. He has to be because you have so many people praying for you, Marcus and the whole situation.

Deanna~ I can't thank you enough for everything you have done for me this week. I can't wait to finally meet you in person.

Shout Out!

Today I just want to send a shout out to two awesome posts by my blogging friends, Deanna Shrodes over at Lifetime Intimate Portrait and Tara Sloan over at Destiny Driven. Both of these women hit on the subject about Senator Mc Cain's pick for VP, Governor Sara Palin of Alaska. Honestly I think McCain chose a great running mate and what she and Hillary Clinton has done for the future of women is awesome! I don't think I could add anything else to these two posts so go check out these two posts! I am sure you will agree with me that they are awesome! If you disagree let me know.