"Oh that you Lord would bless us indeed and would enlarge our territory, that Your hand would be with us and that you would keep us from harm." 1 Chron. 4:10.
Ok so again I have been super busy and to be quite honest just not in the mood to write. Sorta been over whelmed with activities, family things and just stuff with the kids. But I wanted to post this link
And give you all some great links to Pastor Deanna Shrodes site. She is continuing the "Just Say It" Series and I want you to read it. I meant to post what she had written last week but never got around to it. So instead I am going to give you links to each topic. Make sure you check them out, there is so great stuff there!
Deanna is continuing the series so keep checking her blog. I will try to keep links to them coming your way. For now I have a house that is screaming in pain because it needs to be cleaned! So I am off of her for now.
Ok here goes - My dear friend Deanna Shrodes is starting a new series and it's great! I wanted to share it with you and so each posting on this series she will be doing I will be posting on my blog. She is a wonderful minister and friend. I hope you enjoy, are challenged and that your eyes are open and have ears to hear on this subject!
Writing a series of posts on this topic has been on my heart for a while but I was just pushed over the proverbial edge last week to do something about it, so here goes. Recently we ministered at a wonderful church and the service went great and afterwards the pastors said to us, "Thank you so much for coming in and saying what we can't say." I hear that all the time when I preach at places. I hear it from America, to Africa, from small towns to large ones. Now, let me say I totally understand. This is how I lived for all of our years in ministry until we came to Florida. And I don't look down on people nor blame them for feeling that way or running the church that way. Pastors who wait for a guest speaker to come in and say what they evidently can't say are in abundance and are also in a very tough situation. Let me tell you, church people have NO IDEA what pastors go through. Did you know a survey was done of the most stressful jobs in America and pastor came in at #2. [The number one spot went to dentists. Evidently a lot of them even commit suicide or have breakdowns. The reason given was because most people hate going to the dentist and so they are used to people dreading coming to see them. Also, they are doing tedious work in a small space - people's mouths - all day long.] Over the coming weeks, I am going to do some posts about what your pastor wishes they could just bring out in the open and tell you, but some fear to. I want to share with you the ins and outs of what makes some of them very stressed out and what you can do to help them. In our previous pastorate, we would go through difficult situations of various kinds, just as all pastors do. A few times a year we would have a guest speaker and although we wouldn't tell them the problems beforehand or ask them to address certain things, Larry and I would pray out hearts out that the visiting minister would come in and "say what we couldn't say." (Translation: say what we would say if we didn't have the threat of World War III breaking out in the church, or being forced to resign because we simply laid the issues honestly on the table.) I remember at a previous pastorate how we prayed and fasted for a season, believing for God to speak to a guest evangelist to deal with some things that were current problems in the church. One lady had been giving us serious issues for some time. There were even times she would inappropriately interrupt the service. One time she had the gall to approach the pulpit when my husband was ministering and said, "The Lord has told me to take this service in a different direction." Of course he didn't put up with that and told her to sit down. She did but she would push the envelope constantly and it was so draining to deal with. We prayed that the evangelist would get a Word from God and deal with this lady. Lo and behold he called her out right there in the service and dealt with her! He gave her a word of knowledge and said, "you are out from under the authority of the pastors and have a critical spirit and need to submit to the pastors and he leadership of this church." We hadn't told the evangelist anything. This was a total God thing. And, the service where this happened the lady said NOTHING to show her true colors-- she was just quietly sitting in her seat. When all this was happening I was playing the keyboard in the background as he ministered and it was everything I could do to not show emotions as all this happened. I kept a poker face, and just stood there and played when the evangelist corrected her but afterwards when we went home, I jumped up and down and was leaping and praising God. So, why didn't I just deal with her? We were in a political hornet's nest. We feared for our ministry, our family, our livelihood. It's the place where way too many pastors find themselves. So, when I moved to Florida I said, "never again." I am NOT going go all year long with unaddressed situations, afraid to say it like it is, just praying that a guest comes in and "says something I can't." I thought, "I'll say it like it is plain and simple, and if they don't like it, I'll resign and go be a greeter at Walmart and hand out smiley stickers." Seriously. I am NOT kidding. And that's how I've lived for the last 7+ years! Occasionally we have speakers come in who will say things in our church here like, "Now, I'm telling you folks this...your pastor would probably like to tell you this but he/she can't do that..." and our people look puzzled as if to say, "what are you talking about? There's really not much if anything that our pastors would not dare to say." I do realize that many pastors are understandably afraid.. They aren't ready to pack their U-Haul and start passing out the smiley stickers and go on government assistance and then explain to their kids that they have no money for school clothes or supplies simply because Daddy or Mommy had to speak the truth about something in church. I get it...really I do. But I'm not afraid anymore and haven't been for a long time. So here's what's up. I'm writing a series of posts coming up..."what your pastor wants to say but can't." This is going to be so fun. Because a lot of people who are church folks across the nation and beyond read this blog and hopefully it will open some eyes as to what your pastor really thinks but might not ever dare to tell you. For those who wonder what my church people are going to think reading these posts, not to worry...they've heard all this already -- and more. And, they seem to want to keep me around for a really long time despite it. Or maybe even because of it...
Last week my friend Pastor Deanna Shrodes did a week long series on marriage and covered a variety topics. It was such a great series I thought I would give you links to each day over at her blog. This is NOT light reading, Pastor Deanna deals with a lot of deep stuff and confronts quite a bit as well. I encourage you to go over and read her marriage series (5 days in all), even if you have a strong marriage what she has to say will encourage you to go further. try to read these in order, they do build on each other!
Friday's topic covers a broad range of sex in the marriage questions that her readers posed to her on her comments page and through private emails.
I totally agree with everything Pastor Deanna has to say. Her answers and topics are all Biblical based. Again go check it out. Sean and I have a very strong and steady marriage. Yes we get in fights, disagreements and spats. Yes we disagree on a variety of things but we are unified. We made a covenant before God, family and friends that we were committing our lives to each other through think and thin. It's not always been easy, there have been times when we both wanted to throw in the towel. But with God's help we stuck it out and have fought for each other, the marriage and the kids. Divorce is NOT the easy way out, ask anyone that has gone or is going through it right now. It's not easy and I am not talking financially here. I am talking about emotionally. Even with out children involved emotionally both parties are torn apart. I have watch and am watching some of my good friends go through this right now and they are struggling. Please if you are thinking about divorce seek help. Seek marriage counseling. Don't throw in the towel until you have done EVERYTHING you can to save it and that means letting go of hurt as well.
Go read the Marriage Series by Pastor Deanna Shrodes, YOU WILL BE BLESSED!
miracles that is! Yes! YES! YES! This afternoon was the first afternoon in over 10 days that Kristofer only had one meltdown and I know why and for what reason! YAHOO! We have endured 10 long days of multiple meltdowns and I would say 90% of them we had no idea why or what set them off. Can I sigh a sigh of relief? Maybe...hoping...waiting for the break through...pushing through for the break through....need the break through....
For a fantastic teaching on The Breaking Point check out this...it is written by Tara Sloan. She shared this at the Unstoppable Conference...it is big, it was huge and it made a gigantic impact on my life and still is!
The Breaking Point - A few months ago I began to hear the Lord speak to me about Unstoppable. Of course I listened, took note and continued to seek Him for direction. As the conference came closer and closer, I began to sense an extreme urgency. I have learned that whenever that happens, God is trying to get my undivided attention. So, I begin to press in. As I sought the Lord, I heard Him say, “Tara, there are women who will be at Unstoppable who are currently at their breaking point. They are at a crossroads that could potentially paralyze them. My heart is that they not be broken and crippled by what they have been facing but that they be propelled through it by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
Tonight, we are going to take a candid look at the lives of three women who made entirely different choices. One of them ended up paralyzed, another, propelled and the last one lost the most… all of them at the breaking point. I am a HUGE believer in destiny. God has a strategic plan for each and every one of us. I know this and believe it with every fiber of my being. However, there are still times in every one of our lives when circumstances, situations, people well intentioned… or not will force us to the very place where we have no idea whether or not we can go on. I am going to begin reading in 2 Samuel, chapter 13:1-20… I am reading from The Message translation… (I won't post because of space... so turn there and read...)
Many of you know WHO you are, like Tamar, you KNOW who your daddy is- but more than that you can also identify with the shame, pain, fear, rejection and betrayal Tamar experienced. People who promised they’d never leave, they left, promises made become promises broken, and the days and nights you prayed, labored, laid awake and poured into people are thrown at your feet in a heap. It leaves you feeling used, violated, just like Tamar. Yet look at what she did, after Amnon raped her, he told her to go away, yet we’re talking about a woman here. She’s thinking, “Oh my goodness, he’s just going to use me up and throw me out? Oh no, he can’t do that to me” She began to tell him how she felt, begging, pleading… and he had her PHYSICALLY removed. They put her out and BOLTED the door. I can just see her, as she’s being drug out, yelling and screaming, then the door is shut and locked as she is lying on the ground sobbing, no dignity left, beating on the door, “Amnon, you can’t do this to me! Amnon! Amnon, don’t leave me like this!” Tamar deserved better treatment as an Israelite. Tamar deserved better treatment as a relative. Tamar deserved better treatment as a sister. Tamar deserved better treatment as a princess. Despite all this, Amnon spitefully treats Tamar as this woman. Then after being rejected again by being ignored, Tamar broke. She ripped her gown off, her gown signifying her identity, her status and she heaped ashes upon her head symbolizing the shame of hat she had just encountered. She covered her head and headed home where she ran into her brother Absalom who knew exactly what had occurred as we see in verse 20… READ VERSE 20… Absalom tried to comfort Tamar by saying that she “should not take it to heart”.
These are hollow words indeed, for she has been violated by her brother, and the cultural context of that time dictated that her future was irreparably altered. I know Absalom meant well, but come on! That’s like putting a band aid on a broken arm! This woman was SO burdened by what she was carrying that she stripped herself of her identity. She was broken, distraught, and now wore her shame upon her head. Her brother knew by looking at her- and yet helped her cover it as did her father, at the time anyway. What gets me about the LACK of what David and Absalom did is just that- they didn’t do ANYTHING… by doing this they let Tamar continue to be broken, paralyzed by the violation committed against her by someone who supposedly loved her no less! They could have helped silence her scream, “Don’t leave me like this! Absalom! Amnon! Daddy! God! Somebody help me!”
I wonder how many of you in this room have had those closest to you ignore the cry of your pain. Unfortunately, that is Tamar’s story. Her hopes for children and her own home were shattered. At that point, the point I call the “breaking point,” Tamar was faced with a decision. Verse 20 says she lived in Absalom’s house a desolate woman. However, her cry, her scream is still living. Can you hear it? Perhaps it is YOUR cry tonight. The circumstances, pain and violations committed against you have you at the breaking point that threatens to paralyze you and keep you locked up. As you examine yourself tonight, are there circumstances, secrets, deep areas in your life threatening to paralyze as you face the breaking point tonight? (Someone holding their head in their hands saying, “I just want to get through this weekend, go home and quit… it is just too much to bear…) Before you give in, remember, what you have gone through doesn’t have to paralyze you… it can propel you… if you don’t give up… God desires to turn your setback into a comeback! The pain you are feeling is pain with a purpose. He isn’t ignoring your pain, He hasn’t forgotten you, He desires to turn your pain into power!
I told you we would explore three women… I just gave you one scenario, what paralysis will bring you, now let’s look at a woman who used the adversity she faced to propel her… Turn to Luke, chapter 7. Beginning in verse 36… (READ THROUGH VERSE 50) Mary was known as a sinner. When she walked into the room her every move, past, present and future was discussed among whispers. Have you ever walked into a room like that? If that isn’t a breaking point, goodness! Tell me what is! Mary was tired of living with the pain, she was desperate to move forward. So she found the most valued thing she owned, it represented her past, present and future. And it cost her something… a decision to face her accusers, confront her past, challenge religion and hope for a future. I can just see her standing at the threshold of the door, gathering the courage to go in. But that was not her breaking point. Her breaking point was in the "breaking of her box." That was HER box. She didn't keep hers at home and run into Neimen Marcus for a knock off that would serve the purpose. No, she took what was most precious to her, what had cost her so much, her security, what meant everything in the world to her and she broke it open and poured it out. As we all know, Mary’s box held a costly perfume, BUT what she did with it represented much more than what it contained. Mary did not just open her box and pour out a measure of what it held. Instead she broke it open. A broken vessel can no longer retain its contents. It is powerless to withhold; therefore, it freely spills out all that is within it.
This is the purpose of the breaking. It is not so God can take pleasure in our pain. No! The pain is part of the process when face the breaking point, but it is not the purpose. The goal is the fragrance, the sweet aroma that fills the air...and the nostrils of God. As she poured the oil from the box, a beautiful fragrance filled the room. It changed the atmosphere. Being at the feet of Jesus, of your Daddy God changes things. It looks religion in the face and dares it to judge. It will change rules, regulations and laws for your behalf. I just love the fact that she broke HER box. In her own way, she said the same thing Tamar said… “Jesus, don’t leave me like this! Help me!” Her actions relinquished any control she had. You see, if she had just opened the box and poured a measure that she thought was sufficient she could also put the top back on. But, in the breaking of the box, there is a reckless abandonment that cried, "It is all yours Jesus. I'm giving it all to you. I am breaking my box open as a sacrifice to you. Take it all! My pain, my fear, regret; take my future, my potential and my promise… take it all…"
When this time of worship occurs at the Breaking Point, something happens. Our heart's cry deviates from, "What about what happened to me?" to "How I can use what has happened to me for You Lord? Here is what I have. I break it open before You. It's no use to me unless it is mixed with Your presence." You see ladies, we need to stop asking God, “Why did this happen to me?” and begin asking God, “Why did I overcome it?” See, I am not big on surviving anymore, I don’t want to be a survivor, I want to be an over comer! The word survive means, to remain alive or in existence… well that can mean you are barely hanging on through life support… BUT the word overcome means to conquer, to gain mastery over or win. Just because you went through it does not mean you are defined by it! When they come and say, “Whew, they barely made it through that church split, but they survived…” Something ought to rise up in you say, “Oh no… we didn’t survive anything… we OVERCAME!” We conquered the enemy at the breaking point! We won!
There is a choice tonight for those of you who find yourselves at the “breaking point.” There are some of you who just don’t think it is worth it anymore and you are tempted to hold on to whatever it is you have locked up in your box. For some of you it is pain, fear of being rejected again, or a shameful past that is threatening to paralyze you. For others, it is brokenness, failed dreams, or unfulfilled dreams. Remember Tamar? Absalom’s house became her alabaster box. It held the potential, pain, promise, and shame of this woman. When she failed to “break out the box” she remained a victim, she remained a person of untapped potential.
These things were as costly as the oil in Mary’s box. If broken up and given to God, her future would have been much different. Or will you be like Mary tonight, will your cry at the breaking point propel you though it by the power of the Holy Spirit. You may still have to deal with stuff, because you can do everything right and still have people do you wrong or circumstances knock you off your feet! Being wounded is a temporary event but healing is a process. Just because you’ve been treated badly doesn’t mean you have to curl up and die!
Psalm 23 tells us that He is the restorer of our soul! Mary was ridiculed as she broke open her box and with that decision, her life and the atmosphere she was in was completely changed! Think about it… are you willing to break that box tonight? There are Tamar’s in this room tonight… desperately wanting to be like Mary. They are screaming, some are whispering for lack of strength, “Don’t leave me like this… Somebody help me…” Tonight we all have a choice to break open our box like Mary or remained locked up like Tamar… but there are some of you even beyond that point… there is more woman I want to present to you tonight… please turn to Judges 19, we’ll begin with verse 22 and read through verse 27.
“And her hand was on the door and she was laying on the threshold.” She went through abuse all night, suffered the pain and the sacrifice and after they let her go she crawled through the pain and the difficulty of what she just endured and she got to the door and died. There are many in this room today that the process has been so painful and abusive that now that an effective door is open in front of you, you just don’t have the strength to push through. The Lord has spoken to me and said, “Tell them not to extend all they have to get to this point only to die on the threshold. You have been through too much.” Don’t let the pain of the process cause you to quit and forfeit your destiny. I know it has been a long painful night but morning is on the way and if you can press through the night your new day is about to begin. Don’t die on the threshold, don’t die at your breaking point… The Lord hears your cries tonight… h e sees your struggle to be like Mary, not one of us wants to be paralyzed, or die on the threshold… but the pain is sometimes so hard to bear alone… some days are down right miracles that we ever got through them… tonight, this altar represents the breaking point… whatever yours may be… At the breaking point, hold on… at the breaking point… don’t paralyze your potential by shutting down… at the breaking point, lay it all down… every bit of pain, every broken promise, every disappointment, and give them to the Father… it is at the breaking point… • My ENEMIES will become my TEACHERS • My MISTAKES will become my WISDOM • My FAILURES will become my NEW OPPORTUNITIES • My UNDESIRED ENDINGS will become my DESIRED BEGINNINGS
And as it says in the Message translation in Job 8:7, “Even though you're not much right now, you'll end up better than ever."
The BEST IS yet to come!
I pray that this teaching by Tara minister to you were ever you are in what ever circumstance you may be in! Hold on through the night your morning is on the way...
Lord, tonight I am holding on through the night, through this fight through this week of uncertainty with our son, through this month of financial breaking, through this year of brokenness and holding fast to You! Holding for the sunrise, holding on for clarity, holding on for direction, holding on for financial break through, holding on for complete healing from depression to healing of my knees. I am holding fast and strong to You, I am clinging on to the hem of Your garment Jesus!
This afternoon the Children's Ministry hosted a Rockin' 4 Jesus (rock-a-thon) to raise funds for BGMC. BGMC stands for Boys and Girls Missionary Challenge. Basically BGMC helps send a variety of materials for the missionaries through the Assemblies of God. We had 9 kids ages 4 -10 rockin' away for three hours. We took a short break for some yummy pizza from Papa Murphy's pizza. These kids had a blast. During part of the rocking time we took advantage of having them all there and practiced our songs with the bells. They are getting really good with them...or maybe I should say I am getting better at flipping those pages so they know what to do! Either way fun was had by everyone!
A HUGE THANK YOU goes out to Theresa Lambert, Jimmy Lambert and Pastor Sean ( my honey ) for helping me pull this event off. Without their help chaos would have reigned and I would have lost my sanity! With the pledges and money already brought in our kids raised $115 as of right now all to help our missionaries! I am SO PROUD of all of these kiddos!
SO enjoy the pictures! Tomorrow I will be eating pie so to speak...tune in tomorrow afternoon some time I will be sure to post some fun pictures of this... Just wait and see what I am about to endure! LOL!
My two little servants in training! LOL! Actually these two resemble two of my diaper heads...lol! They love to help vaccume at church...too bad they don't like to at home!
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This afternoon the Children's Ministry hosted a Rockin' 4 Jesus (rock-a-thon) to raise funds for BGMC. BGMC stands for Boys and Girls Missionary Challenge. Basically BGMC helps send a variety of materials for the missionaries through the Assemblies of God. We had 9 kids ages 4 -10 rockin' away for three hours. We took a short break for some yummy pizza from Papa Murphy's pizza. These kids had a blast. During part of the rocking time we took advantage of having them all there and practiced our songs with the bells. They are getting really good with them...or maybe I should say I am getting better at flipping those pages so they know what to do! Either way fun was had by everyone!
